Green Glass Bangles-Deepa Ahuja


 

Glancing sideways at the green glass bangles adorning his wife Sandhya’s wrists, Prashant Sharma felt a surge of rage return to his body. All his frustrations were being directed at the harmless bangles these days. That Sandhya would be the right kind of partner for him was decided by his parents, as was his studying science and then engineering, fasting on Tuesdays, visiting the temple on Saturdays and of course, having a child after 3 years of being married. 

 

Initially, married life had been harmonious, even happy but over course of time Prashant grew tired of explaining to Sandhya the concept of modern day companionship. Understandable that her conservative upbringing prevented her from being on board with all his ideas, but she didn’t have to be so rigid either. Refusing to accompany him to any parties, trying new cuisines or even taking those annoying green glass bangles off. “Sign and pride of being a married woman”, she said. “Their jingling disrupts my sleep,Sandhya!”, “I’ll take them off at night, ok?” As promised, taking them off at night, she would place them on the nightstand and slip them back on her slender wrists, firstthing in the morning.

 

“Enough!”, he thought while pressing the accelerator, halfway through to Manali”. It had taken him all his charm to convince her to leave their son in the grandparents’ care to go on a trip with him alone. For him, Preeti staring at him coldly, and saying, “It is now or never, Prashant” had done it. Something had snapped inside him.

 

Having joined his department as a sales executive two years ago, Preeti was everything that Prashant desired but couldn’t be. Bold, outspoken, ambitious, spontaneous and most of all living life on her own terms. For Preeti, having grown up without a father, Prashant represented, safety and security. He told himself to be careful, but desire rarely is. Soon neither could imagine a life without each other

 

Preeti’s ultimatum came after innumerable fights and pleas to seek separation from Sandhya, but Prashant evaded fearinghis parents’ objection. “There has to be some other way.”, he thought

 

The idea of pushing Sandhya off a cliff came to him in a dream one night. Waking up startled. Wiping the beads of sweat running down his forehead with his t-shirt sleeve. Soaked in sweat, heart palpitating, Prashant looked over at the other side of the bed to find her sleeping peacefully. He sighed. With relief or remorse, he did not know. He lay down pulling the covers up over his face, wondering when sleep would come back.

 

Even though his hand did not tremble when he pushed her does not mean that he didn’t feel like his heart would burst out of his chest, that his shirt wasn’t soaked in sweat or that his cheeks weren’t streaked with tears. but it had to be done.

 

Prashant found himself grieving genuinely. For Sandhya,never coming back from where she was and he, never going back to who he was. Perched on the precipice of remorse and relief once again, he was all alone once the prayer meeting was over.

 

Bereft of hunger, he poured himself a large drink, watching the rich, gold liquid trickle down slowly over the ice cubes before he took a sip. There was complete silence around him when he went to bed, except for the noises in his head. Putting the half empty bottle away, he managed to fall asleep only to be awakened by a gentle nudge. As if in a trance, he noticed Sandhya sitting on the opposite end of the bed. She was gently braiding her long hair, as was her habit, before bedtime. “Chintu’s school bag is under his desk. He needs to wear his sports uniform tomorrow. Oh, and remember, he only likes to take parathas in tiffin” 

 

Waking up startled, wiping the beads of sweat running down his forehead with his t-shirt sleeve. Soaked in sweat, heart palpitating Prashant looked around to find himself alone. Hesighed. With relief for sure, this time, fearfully looking over to the other side of the bed. There on the nightstand were a dozen green glass bangles. Hadn’t he put them away? He lay down, pulling the covers up over his face, wondering when sleep would come back, if it ever did?

 

 

 

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